It’s a unique scenario, even for me. I’m forty-seven days from wheels up, and I’ve found a woman who only speaks Spanish and plays a game I haven’t seen since

I just got back from Phoenix, and my head is still ringing from the impact. I found this beautiful little Mexican woman—light-skinned, eyes like a fever dream—and we are currently

First, I had to fire the staff. Black Pearl—or “Michigan,” as we called her in the office—had become a high-maintenance liability. It wasn’t just the sex; it was the goddamn

That Toby Keith song? It used to be a funny anthem I’d sing when I was drunk. “I ain’t as good as I once was, but I’m as good once

She used to stretch out in my bed like she held the deed to the mattress. Three times a day, minimum. It was a deranged cardio program that only two

You want to know why it turns my stomach to watch a woman recycle her soul every 6 to 12 months. I have this friend, Lara. A serial offender. She

I have a saying, carved into the granite of my own goddamn experience: If you don’t drink, I don’t trust you. I’ve walked out on dates. I’ve walked out on

When I said I was going to divorce my mother at 13, I divorced my mother. When I said I was joining the Navy, I didn’t ask permission; I signed

I’ll admit it. I have a problem. I don’t blow up often. I don’t run around screaming like a lunatic. I’m a generally good dude. But I have a Code.

I come from a marriage where I was a utility, not a priority. I was the generator, the ATM, the problem-solver. But I wasn’t the point. And looking back, past